


all things just keep getting better

by kiaronna



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Don't copy to another site, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Mutual Pining, look I loved season 3 and I loved the BBQ episode and I LOVE ALL OF THEM, queer eye AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-06
Updated: 2019-04-06
Packaged: 2020-01-05 21:34:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18374504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiaronna/pseuds/kiaronna
Summary: The Fabulous Five adventure in St. Petersburg to shower love on a doting grandfather and his prickly, ice skater grandson.Also, the Fashion Expert and the Food/Fitness Expert spend a lot of time not noticing that they're holding hands.





	all things just keep getting better

**Author's Note:**

  * For [seventhstar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/seventhstar/gifts).



> Nuri remember how I screamed this at you many blue moons ago and you said you wanted it  
> Before anyone asks, Antoni was my favorite before Tan France geeked out over a closet and I realized this a-fricking-mazing nerd was the best ever

“So, guys,” Phichit sing-songs, hands on the wheel, “today we’re headed for the heart of St. Petersburg—culture! Art! History!”

_[Phichit Chulanont: Culture Expert]_

A cheer goes up from the entire car.

“And hopefully,” Phichit continues, “some embarrassing baby pictures of our fashion expert?”

From his dignified pose in the backseat, one hand playing with his Burberry scarf and the other curled around the man in the middle seat, the silver-haired man smiles.

“I think you’ll be disappointed,” he says, “they couldn’t take pictures of me. Too much glare—I sparkled.”

_[Viktor Nikiforov: Fashion Expert]_

“ _Liar_ ,” the blonde in the back right seat scolds. “We’ll find those baby pictures, _cherie_. Hopefully they’ll be the only nude pictures of you out and about, though I suppose we’re never sure.”

_[Christophe Giacometti: Grooming Expert]_

“We can definitely see my baby pictures,” interrupts the man in the shotgun seat. “Before my first heartbreak, there was so much hope in my eyes.”

_[Georgi Popovich: Design Expert]_

“I don’t know about heartbreak,” the man in the middle seat says, “but my hope is that I get to try some authentic Russian cuisine and cry at the ballet.”

“You just don’t know about heartbreak because _you’re_ the heartbreaker, Yuuri.”

_[Katsuki Yuuri: Food and Fitness Expert]_

“But don’t worry,” Phichit finishes with a beaming smile, “it’s season 3 of _Queer Eye_. There’s no way any of us are making it through without some tears.”

//\\\

 [ _Queer Eye_ theme music plays]

[Various shots of the Fab 5 dancing]

[Viktor and Yuuri tango across the white room while laughing uncontrollably, ending in a dip]

[ _Queer Eye: Making History.]_

//\\\

“Would it really be St. Petersburg without some artistic flair? And what better place to find that than… the ice rink! This is where we’ll find our hero.”

“So cold!” Christophe complains, pouting, while Georgi mutters,

“Just like my exes’ hearts.” Georgi is happily married. This has not curbed his flair for the dramatic.

“You know it’s cold,” Viktor says, “when…” he gestures vaguely to his chest. Behind him, Yuuri adjusts his collar, inexplicably heated.

“Did you know we were coming here? You’re wearing a sweater.”

“It’s St. Petersburg,” Viktor replies airily. “I always have a sweater on hand. I brought one for you too, it’s—”

“WHOA,” Phichit interrupts excitedly, and the camera swings to a youthful blonde, twisting in the air with a spray of ice.

“Wonderful!” Viktor cheers. “Is this our newest charge?”

“I believe that’s our nominator,” Christophe corrects, and leans out over the barrier, waving cheerfully. “Plisetsky?”

With a flash of sharp blades and young, eternal rage, the blonde tears up the ice between them. It’s only once he’s come to a stop, suspiciously eyeing all of them, that he replies.

“You actually came.”

“The Fabulous Five, at your service!” Phichit grins. Yuuri has seen actual monarchs melt at one of Phichit’s trademark smiles, but Yuri Plisetsky’s eyes just narrow further. “I haven’t been allowed to see it, but we’ve heard from production that your video application was incredibly heartwarming—“

“My grandpa’s over there,” Yuri snaps furiously, the very image of heartwarming. “Why are you wasting time talking to me?!”

“I’m sure he’s not at all worried that five tall, ostentatious men and a camera crew have converged on his young grandson,” Georgi soothes. “Ah, yes, here he comes now.”

An older gentleman, in layers and with a soft grey cap, makes his way down the bleachers with the aid of a cane. Lithely, Yuuri strides over and offers him an arm— from beside the camera, Viktor sighs softly.

“Yura, introduce me to your friends.”

“ _Friends_ ,” Yuri spits.

Without missing a beat, Phichit greets him with a firm handshake, introducing Yuuri immediately after.

“You may not have heard of us, sir, but we’re hoping to hear so much about you!”

//\\\

[Various shots of the Fab 5 posing]

 [ _Queer Eye: Cold Ice Rink, Warm Hearts.]_

//\\\

“Our home isn’t much,” Nikolai confesses as he clicks open the door to the flat.

“Don’t worry, Georgi will make it too much,” Viktor assures him, as the five of them tumble over the threshold. “Ah, it’s cute! Where’s Yurio’s room?”

This is the only warning received before the next shot is the five of them, with various sparkly outfits and far too much tiger print tied at various points on their body. Slung over shoulders, wrapped around waists. Christophe sashays by the others.

“I haven’t worn animal print in ages, do you think it makes my—“ _bleep_ “—look good?”

Nikolai uncertainly opens his mouth to reply.

“Don’t answer him,” Georgi, Yuuri, and Viktor chorus. It’s not a real question.

From around the corner, Phichit dives, shoots a Nerf gun that sticks right to Viktor’s jacket.

“Man down!” Viktor gasps, flinging his arms up and falling backwards in a dramatic, sparkling leopard print spiral. The swooning lands him right in Yuuri’s arms. “Say goodbye,” Viktor stage whispers.

“Nooooooooo,” Yuuri mutters. To his credit, he does look panicked as he stares downwards into blue eyes. “Vitya, hold on.”

//\\\

“What’s different from last season, you ask? The Victuuri flirting has kicked up by 100%, kids.” Phichit swoops his hands up in a diagonal motion across his body. “My right hand is the flirting. My left hand is our audience approval rating.”

“Oh, _Vitya_ ,” Christophe gasps mockingly from the chair on his right, breathy. “Last year him using that nickname would’ve resulted in 20 minutes of bad footage as they both ran off to calm down.”

“Viktor is a useless lesbian,” Georgi concludes.

“If they are not dating by the end of this season,” Christophe sighs, “I will use shampoo with sodium lauryl sulfate.”

//\\\

[Yuri and Nikolai sit on the interview couch, Nikolai with both hands propped on his cane and Yuri scowling ferociously.]

“I’m going to be a professional ice skater in the Seniors division,” Yuri says. “I moved to St. Petersburg after Yakov—my coach—recruited me, because he coaches here, and if I stayed in my hometown, I couldn’t… Anyway. I was old enough to go by myself, but my grandfather came with me. My mom and the two brats stayed behind.” He glares off-screen. “If you’re watching, hi, Alina. Hi, Irina.”

“My grandson, working so hard, by himself? No,” Nikolai says. “He’s a strong man already, but I want to be there for him. To support his dreams. Our home life has not been the easiest, with Yuri’s father being in and out of the hospital for so long before passing away. It’s just been me and him for long time now, but he never complains, working so hard. Yurotchka has always been the best grandson I could ever ask for.”

//\\\

_[Christophe, Georgi, and Phichit are spread out on the Plisetsky’s couch, still decked out in ridiculous outfits and covered in Nerf bullets. Yuri is standing in the corner, arms crossed]_

“You may be wondering where Viktor is,” Phichit whispers to the camera. “He’s in the closet.”

“The most proud and out gay man I’ve ever met spends _so much_ time in closets,” Christophe grins.

“You made these jokes in season 1,” a voice floats in from offscreen, distant.

“Wow, he’s only been raiding the fridge for two minutes and he’s already _spicy_ , Christophe.”

Yuuri appears around the corner, spatula in hand, wearing an apron with Cyrillic on it. Phichit snaps a photo. “Phichit, this will literally already be _on television_ , you don’t need to preserve the moment.”

“I’m saving Viktor some time.”

Yuuri has moved on, muttering. “So many beets. Also, there are no kitchen appliances. I know he cooks, he said he cooked all the time? But basically all we have here is knives.” He waves the spatula gently in Yuri’s direction. “What does your grandfather use for making pirozhki?”

Yuri riles like a flustered cat. “His _hands_. My hands, if I’m there.”

“Oh god,” Yuuri breathes, “he’s sixty-five years old. Come with me,” and disappears back into the kitchen offscreen. Yuri slinks after him.

“Come here, missus cameralady,” Christophe beckons. The camera obliges, moving in closer on the couch.

“All of us are married,” Christophe purrs, wiggling his flashing hand, “and quite satisfied, may I add. Except for Viktor and Yuuri, those two darlings.”

“They are neither married nor satisfied,” Georgi adds, sagely. “Our Viktor would cry as much as me, if not for water being bad for his outfits.”

“Before Yuuri was a food and fitness expert his title was something else, if you catch my meaning. Do your thing, production crew!” Phichit cheers.

[Slow pan to Yuuri’s unassuming face, in the kitchen. Yuuri looks back over his shoulder, and from beside him, Yurio narrows his eyes. Text reads Yuuri Katsuki: Viktor Nikiforov Expert]

“Phichit, what are you doing?”

“I’m getting us into the Popular section on Netflix, Yuuri, as usual.”

“Oh, okay.” He lifts a spoon. “Do you think this has too much ginger in it?”

//\\\

Viktor and Nikolai emerge from one of the rooms, Nikolai patting the arm of the black suit, a small smile on Viktor’s face. They are chatting pleasantly in Russian, but when Viktor looks up and sees the camera, he switches easily into English. Somewhere offscreen there are the sounds of utensils dropping.

“So I hear you’re having a birthday party for Yuri,” Phichit beams, bouncing towards them.

“Yes,” Nikolai says, “my Yurotchka is turning fifteen. It’s a big year for him, for skating. He deserves celebration for all that he has worked so hard for, but I,” his voice is gruff. “Sometimes I cannot celebrate Yurotchka like he deserves. A party with just his old grandpa will be boring.”

“ _Grandpa_ ,” Yurio sulks.

“We’ve invited over all his friends—“

“You invited the _hag_ , grandpa? Why?!”

“That’s not nice, Yurotchka. We have invited over some rinkmates his age—“

“ _Grandpa_ they don’t even like me—“

“And his coach,” Nikolai finishes calmly. Rubbing his beard a little bit, he adds, “Yurotchka’s coach has done so much for us. When we needed a place to live in this city he helped us find something affordable but good for a home, and before Yurotchka’s first winnings came in, Yakov was understanding. He’s so successful, I’ve been embarrassed to show him how we live since coming here—I want to make a good impression. To show him we are grateful for all he’s done.”

“ _Yakov_ , hmm,” says Christophe. “Yakov Feltsman, the ice skating coach, the one who married that famous Baranovskaya ballerina?”

“They’re divorced now,” Nikolai responds easily.

//\\\

“I instantly sensed _something_ brewing between Nikolai and Yakov,” Viktor says, grinning at the camera before swinging his attention to Yuuri. “Didn’t you?”

“Definitely,” Yuuri says, and where their hands are entwined atop Viktor’s knee, he squeezes, then adds softly, “it’s not just because you’re a romantic.”

“The romance is so strong that even the most in-denial people can sense it,” Phichit says. Yuuri scrunches his nose.

“What?”

“You and Viktor are holding hands again.”

“No we’re not,” Yuuri and Viktor chorus, completely serious.

“Look down,” Georgi says dreamily.

“Hmm, we are,” Viktor says delicately. He does not look sorry. There is no attempt to let go.

//\\\

“So now we’ve met Nikolai,” Phichit says from his interview chair, nodding firmly. “Nikolai has spent so much time taking care of first his kids and now Yuri, that he hasn’t had the opportunity to take care of himself. I want to allow Nikolai to feel cared for and loved. I think we can help him see his value as a grandfather and a good man. Also,” he leans in, “for a top skater, Yuri’s Insta feed is criminally underfollowed. We’re going to fix that, too.”

//\\\

“Part of the way Nikolai expresses his support and love for his grandson is through his cooking,” Yuuri says. “I… that’s what my mother has always done for me, and I know how powerful it is. I want to work with him to make food that accommodates their budget and Yuri’s athletic diet, but doesn’t limit Nikolai’s expression of love.”

//\\\

“The plans I have with this man’s beard,” Christophe swoons, “mmm salt and pepper, oh, I could just—“ there’s a flash to black and back, with Christophe now sitting in a brand new position. “Nikolai makes sure his professional athlete grandson cares for his skin and his body, so I know he can show himself that same self-love and trim,” clap, “that,” clap, “beard,” clap, “darling.”

//\\\

“I will _ruin_ his kitchen,” Georgi says. “Smash it to bits. Gone.”

“He means in a good way,” Phichit clarifies from the seat beside Georgi. “So he can renovate from scratch.”

“Leave the renovation to me. Nikolai will not recognize his formerly-closed-sized home,” Georgi says somberly. “Except for the family photos and keepsakes. Memories are so good to keep around, even if…even if—!”

 _Cut the tape_ , Phichit mouths.

//\\\

“As a grandfather, Nikolai allows his grandson _so_ much freedom to express himself with his clothes,” Viktor hums, eyes sparkling with regal mirth. There is still a tiger print shirt slung about his neck, a mock scarf. “Heartwarming, and yet… displeasing to the eye.”

“Vitya!” Yuuri scolds gently from somewhere off camera, and there’s a screeching “ _I will destroy you!_ ” but the breathy laugh from Yuuri that follows it just has Viktor inclining his head and moving on.

“Nikolai should also feel comfortable in his everyday clothes, and to express himself, because I _know_ there’s a dapper man trying to fight his way out from beneath all those layers and worn-out caps.” A well-timed wink, then a warm gaze aimed to the left of the camera. “I am going to clothe this gentleman in the fabrics worthy of him. A motto I follow with every deserving gentleman.”

//\\\

“Darlings watching this, I don’t know if you realize how much influence we’ve had on each other since we started filming this show, but I am the only one who _touches_ any of the Fab 5’s hair these days,” Christophe explains. “Do you remember Georgi’s hair from season 1? God, I hope you don’t.”

“What Christophe is trying to say,” Phichit chirps helpfully, “is that Viktor dresses all of us now, but there’s only one person he is actually, physically, going into the trailer of and putting clothes on. At the end of season 1 we had a bonfire for Yuuri’s clothing. An honest-to-god twenty foot tall bonfire.”

“Yuuri’s s’mores are like a _mouth explosion_ ,” Christophe adds, “and if our show’s parental guidelines were higher, I would replace the word explosion with something else.”

//\\\

“I think these Fabulous Five will be a great influence on my Yurotchka,” Nikolai says. “Whether they can do anything for a dusty old man like me, we’ll see. I’m already lucky, just having my talented grandson with me. I can’t ask for much more, but if they say they can improve my life, I’m grateful for the opportunity.”

“Am I excited the,” Yuri has to struggle with the words, “ _Fabulous 5_ are here? My grandpa deserves the best,” he hisses, jabbing at the camera with one finger. “My rinkmate Mila said the Fabulous Five would treat him right, and they _better_. Or they’ll have me to answer to.”

//\\\

“Nikolai,” all five of the Fab 5 chorus from the couch together, “we’re coming at you!”

//\\\

**Author's Note:**

> *gay fear*  
> Look, I am rusty at writing, but chy'all get whatcha get. THank you for suffering through. I am so sorry. I did it for S3 of Queer Eye.


End file.
